Because I feel like Blogging
Current mood: weird
Category: Life
It's rare I wish to talk, but I do for some reason. OMG, wait, It's the big V-day. Happy V-Day everyone. I wish you a lot of kisses, hugs, and butt grabs, and ect. ect.ect.
I'm feeling a bit weird today, so this is a blog that I suggest to everyone they skip.
I'm going home soon and having a nice glass of wine and maybe a white russian. Yay. I don't know why, but on V-Day, I'm never sad about being single. But it's Christmas and my Birthday that I hate being single. Weird, because V-Day is set up for couples, but I find it so enjoyable. It's weird, yeah. I'm weird. I love V-Day. People kissing and making love and all that. lol.
So, what's going on? I've been thinking a lot about moving out of time. That's one of the things I didn't include in my last blog that I knowingly excluuded. I don't know why, it's just that I must get the hell out of town. It's not a reallly reality based thing, but I want to go. I just need to leave. I was thinking for good, I would just go, but then a friend brought me back down from my emotional high I was experiencing. I have family, friends, a career, a church, all that here. How am I to just up and leave. My friend suggested that I just need a vacation away from town. Yeah, but no, but I wanna go for good, but I can and I don't know what else I can do. Geez, I just want to scream sometimes when I have these emotional outbreaks. I have a fantasy. Wanna hear it.
(The crowd goes wild to hear Tommy Speak)
Ok ok, calm down. Alright, my fantasy is to go away to a cabin for a week with some funny 50 something gay guy with history to share. No, more specifically, someone who lived thru the Stonewall riots. Me and this guy would just stay in this cabin and just talk about the way things were, the way things are, and the way things should be. He teaches me to cook a meal or two and we stay just talking by a campfire. at night we watch a nice movie and we sit cuddled up and it's nothing extremly sexual to this. We sleep in the same bed everynight without having sex and both of us are content with this. For an entire week, we are the closeest of friends. Then at the end of the week, we part and keep the week in mind. I have fantasied about other various activities, but this is the main.
Hmmmmm. lol. So, who among my friends are psychologist like myself. Tell me the deep dark meaning of this. Does it mean I feel a need for a connect to the past? Could I be longing for a father figure? Do I wish to be more of an activist? Do I want a sugar daddy? Do I wish to escape from my life and just be enthralled in the life of another? i don't know what the hell I want at this point. I just know that somehow if that were to happen, I would be extremley at peace.
As I sit here and type this, I could actually see it being a woman as well. Male or female. I don't care. actually, i think I might perferr a long gray haired hippie woman. lol. It doesn't matter. Maybe a golden retriever. lol.
Even my fantasies are weird. I've also been having weird dreams about someone who I'm not going to name for fear of them reading this. Now, the dreams are very sexual and it's best you all assume it's you. lol. I know why I'm having these dreams. I'm too sexually stressed. In great need for phyisical companionship, but at the same time not really doing anything to get that. I don't really want it, but my body just keeps saying yes. lol. I'm so focused on Church, and family, and career that I really do not want to infuse the sexual stuff. But damnit, it's hard. (No pun intended)
Well, I'm going to wrap it up. I haven't anymore to say on these matters. Everything sucks. Leave it at that.
Forever you are all in my thoughts and prayers and I love you all. Your friend,
TOMMY D.
Current mood: weird
Category: Life
It's rare I wish to talk, but I do for some reason. OMG, wait, It's the big V-day. Happy V-Day everyone. I wish you a lot of kisses, hugs, and butt grabs, and ect. ect.ect.
I'm feeling a bit weird today, so this is a blog that I suggest to everyone they skip.
I'm going home soon and having a nice glass of wine and maybe a white russian. Yay. I don't know why, but on V-Day, I'm never sad about being single. But it's Christmas and my Birthday that I hate being single. Weird, because V-Day is set up for couples, but I find it so enjoyable. It's weird, yeah. I'm weird. I love V-Day. People kissing and making love and all that. lol.
So, what's going on? I've been thinking a lot about moving out of time. That's one of the things I didn't include in my last blog that I knowingly excluuded. I don't know why, it's just that I must get the hell out of town. It's not a reallly reality based thing, but I want to go. I just need to leave. I was thinking for good, I would just go, but then a friend brought me back down from my emotional high I was experiencing. I have family, friends, a career, a church, all that here. How am I to just up and leave. My friend suggested that I just need a vacation away from town. Yeah, but no, but I wanna go for good, but I can and I don't know what else I can do. Geez, I just want to scream sometimes when I have these emotional outbreaks. I have a fantasy. Wanna hear it.
(The crowd goes wild to hear Tommy Speak)
Ok ok, calm down. Alright, my fantasy is to go away to a cabin for a week with some funny 50 something gay guy with history to share. No, more specifically, someone who lived thru the Stonewall riots. Me and this guy would just stay in this cabin and just talk about the way things were, the way things are, and the way things should be. He teaches me to cook a meal or two and we stay just talking by a campfire. at night we watch a nice movie and we sit cuddled up and it's nothing extremly sexual to this. We sleep in the same bed everynight without having sex and both of us are content with this. For an entire week, we are the closeest of friends. Then at the end of the week, we part and keep the week in mind. I have fantasied about other various activities, but this is the main.
Hmmmmm. lol. So, who among my friends are psychologist like myself. Tell me the deep dark meaning of this. Does it mean I feel a need for a connect to the past? Could I be longing for a father figure? Do I wish to be more of an activist? Do I want a sugar daddy? Do I wish to escape from my life and just be enthralled in the life of another? i don't know what the hell I want at this point. I just know that somehow if that were to happen, I would be extremley at peace.
As I sit here and type this, I could actually see it being a woman as well. Male or female. I don't care. actually, i think I might perferr a long gray haired hippie woman. lol. It doesn't matter. Maybe a golden retriever. lol.
Even my fantasies are weird. I've also been having weird dreams about someone who I'm not going to name for fear of them reading this. Now, the dreams are very sexual and it's best you all assume it's you. lol. I know why I'm having these dreams. I'm too sexually stressed. In great need for phyisical companionship, but at the same time not really doing anything to get that. I don't really want it, but my body just keeps saying yes. lol. I'm so focused on Church, and family, and career that I really do not want to infuse the sexual stuff. But damnit, it's hard. (No pun intended)
Well, I'm going to wrap it up. I haven't anymore to say on these matters. Everything sucks. Leave it at that.
Forever you are all in my thoughts and prayers and I love you all. Your friend,
TOMMY D.