Life's TRUE Journey

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A quick bloggy of nonesense Ok, so, as you all may know, I am currently without a computer at home except for the simple desktop which doesn't have a high speed connection and I just got rid of my dail up connection for it two months ago. So, I don't want to re enroll in a dail up account. I'm still waiting to get my laptop back to working. Not having a laptop hasn't been tooo terribly bad. I've actually managed to clean my room and also I've read (and this isn't a joke) six full books over the last month. Yeah, OCD can really be a good thing sometimes. So, this is not going to be an in dept totally honest blog because I'm at a public library and people are already looking at me. lol. Of course, why wouldn't they. I'm dead sexy. Yes, today I'm very very gay. !!!! Do you have any ideal how many hot guys are here at the library! mmmm mmm mmm. I could be a total hwhore if i wanted to buty i'm not trying to be. I'm just here...

Uh Oh. 2007 Thank Yous. Current mood: rushed Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes Ok , so, its that time of year. The thing that everyone has been waiting for. Tommy's Annual Thank Yous. YAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!! (And the crowd goes wild) I can not believe I've kept up with this tradition for 7 years now. It's awesome. I'm proud of the fact that i actually have a tradition that i can keep. So, without farther ado, I will get to it. But first of course my resolutions and my disclaimer. I try to have at least five resolutions . What exactly do I need to resolve to do? Ok , 1. Pieces of You- I will put my family back together this year. We have been under so much stress that it's just ripped such a huge hole in this family. So, I will put it back together. I've already begun this, but I will step up my efforts and get the results I need. 2. Pieces of Me- I will get my spirit back from the grips of the past. I made this a resoulution last year, but was not able...

Tuesday, December 25, 2007 Rundown, Repost, and Regulars Current mood: calm Category: Friends So many things to discuse and unfortunatley, i've let things pile up. I've not been on for a while trying to build myself up again and all that. So, heres a run down. Today, as like the last 6 years, I will repost my annual thank yous from last year. The Thank yous are something i do every year (7 years now) at new yearsday, reflecting on year past, and giving thanks to the people wh impacted my life. But you knew that, right? Now, i still owe a special Julia blog, which i will do Friday along with a full update on my life. So mark that day on your calenders. I actually uploaded a video of the whole Julia thing, but its basically the events of the funeral and me trying to speak while crying like a baby, so a blog is more fitting. Then of course on New Years day, i will post the 2007 thank yous (last couple of years, i've been late,but i will do my best this year). Okay, th...

Bad Days Suck Current mood: rejected Category: Life Hey Folks. Just wanted to blog and see if it would help me feel better today. Maybe because it's raining or whatever, but I'm having one of those shitty days where I don't feel good about myself and people annoy me. Poor Justin Dustin was a victim of that today. He was talking about my previous journal entry, and he said i painted him out to be a bad guy. I let him no that no one even mentioned anything like that and that he was just stupid. Then my mother got on my nerves. I'm just trying to cook me something to eat and she comes around just asking all these questions and I'm like, really not in the mood to talk. I just want to get something to eat and whatever. I tried to just have a little peace and tim to myself. But then she gets emotional because i'm not uppy and happy and wanting to envoke conversation. Then, just stupid shit got to me today. On the shuttle bus to and from work no one sat next...

It's been so many months since I posted a blog, I don't think I remember how. But I promised Justin Dustin to post oe because, and I'm quoting "I want to know how you really feel about me" Mkay . So blogging shall begin now. At the forefront of my complex mind is the absoulute joy I feel right now. This is mainly over my new place of employment, Federal Express. I've been questioning myself on why I feel such emmense joy working there. One could say it's because how horrible my last job went. I care not too talk to much about it, but they made the mistake of playing with my money so I played a little back and they didn't like that too well. When i get off of work from fed ex, it's so different from when I used to get off from the old job. I have such positive energy and excitment when I leave fed ex, it's almost humous . I'm constantly asking my friends is it normal to feel so happy about working. Ok , Justin Dustin, here'...

ToO Much time to think. Current mood: confused Category: Life I think too much. I get scared sometimes. I know. I hear so much about death and then I obsess on it for a whole day. This was one of those days. I'm lucky enough to have awesome friends and I thank the lord everyday for each and every one of them. But damn, they make me think too much. People come up to me because they say I'm smart, I'm philisophical. I'm Wise beyond my years or whatever. It's great, but if you know me you know I have a lot to say. But I tell ya, sometimes I get so bogged down with these questions that make me think. Religion/God: Beoing a gay christian buddhist has it's challenges, without saying. This is the most difficult issue to try to explain about myself. For a number of years, I had faith in nothing at all. I lost my father, I was dealing with being violated as a child and as a teen. I experienced so much pain that I broke. But what made me come back "...

Deep Down Drown. Current mood: nervous Category: Life Well look at this. So many people are angry with me right now for various reasons. Mainly surrounds the fact that I've not really been availible to a lot of them. And for this I must appoligies. I've been going thru those never ending changes again. But yet, as always, I revert back to my same habits. Like, my ex. For about a week now I've been staying up every night with him. Yeah, bad Tommy. I can't move on for some reason. He's so pathetic and he always suckers me in. He's trying to change. He wants to change. And I want to help him. Because for so long it was him and I against the world. And to tell you the truth, he's been the only person to be there for me thru it all. He's trying to stop drinking and it's so hard seeing him going thru it. I've been so exhausted from stupid stuff at me job and then coming home to an urgent voicemail from him every single night saying he n...

My Time to Cry. Current mood: contemplative Category: Friends Now, let us begin. But first, a quick update on a few things. So, the imfamous Kenny and I made up. Yeah. Listen to this, peeps, I actually had an adult conversation with him. For a wekk, I did the childish thing. Being angry with him, shunning him, being a total bitch to everyone. Then, on New Years eve, my ex booked a hotel room for me because of reasons I care not disclose here. Well, he had booked it at the begining of December and things didn't work out like he hoped so he said I could have it. Besides the point. So, who did I spend New Years eve with in a hotel. Yeah. Kenny. Stupid me you say? No no no. It was a chance for us to just relax and talk some things thru and I'm eternally greatful we did. I will discuse all that next blog, but I really have to get these thank yous done. So, ok, lets start with my resoulution. Now, I thought long and hard about these this year and I'm dead ser...

Perfect Lyrics and vocals. On profile. Current mood: sad Category: Music I Will Follow You Into the Dark Lyrics byDeath Cab For Cutie Love of mine some day you will die But I'll be close behind I'll follow you into the dark No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white Just our hands clasped so tight Waiting for the hint of a spark If heaven and hell decide That they both are satisfied Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs If there's no one beside you When your soul embarks Then I'll follow you into the dark In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule I got my knuckles brusied by a lady in black And I held my tongue as she told me "Son fear is the heart of love" So I never went back If heaven and hell decide That they both are satisfied Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs If there's no one beside you When your soul embarks Then I'll follow you into the dark You and me have seen everything to see From Bangkok to Calgary And the sole...

Annual Repost and Update Current mood: crappy Category: Blogging Hello peeps. Merry Christmas to all. My Christmas was lovely. My family gathered, including my brother Will who was not strung out of begging this year, which just made it even more of a blessing. We ate and we reminisced about my dear Grandmother magnolia. I was so happy with this year. So, just to quickly update on some issues in my life. Yes, my ex boyfriend Kevin was in town. Yay. Well, not really. He brought along MARCO. Yeah, so needless to say, I've seen Kevin only twice his entire trip. We really wasn't connecting on any level at all. He seems like a totally different person to me. Oh well. I think it's because I've been distracted with other things in my life. Kenny. What is it with guys with the K in their stupid names. Well, imagine this people. You bring the guy over to meet your mom. You enjoy each others company whole heartedly. Of course, we all ready established that there is no chance that...

funny viagra commercial Ummm, weird shit.

A Blog about nothing Current mood: content Category: Life Hey. This is just a blog about nothing. I just wanted to clear up a few things. Recently, I've been taking notice about what people have been saying about me. Ad if you're one of those people who says " Well it doesn't matter what other people think about you" Well, you're effen wrong because reputation is need and others perception of you won't make or break you, but it can be insightful at time. Here are a few actual quote that I would like to either deny, defend, or affirm. "Tommy is a slut/ho/whore" - Wrong. I've not had many "lovers" at all. I'm flirty yes, but I never take the next steps. In high school, I was very um, slutty, some could say, but I've not been for years now. Next. " Tommy is mean" - Professionally, I can be somewhat hard on my employees. Hell, ok, to be honest, down right devious. I've gained nicknames. (chef ramsey, Boss Bitch, Sl...

Princess Gina Has passed Current mood: sad Category: Pets and Animals I dearest friend, princess Gina, has passed away. She had been sick for a while now. After my kitty I grew up with, Booger, passed away it was weird that a week later Princess Gina showed up at my doorstep, literally. She was so skinny and sickly and she took a spot in my heart right away. As was booger the trouble maker in the family, Princess Gina was very very gentle and quiet. As if she appreciated what I was providing to her. The picture which has been my default picture since I opened my myspace is of her a few days after she arrived at my door step. I've lost another companion, folks. I'm not going to respond as I did when booger passed away as to how a cat ins't just a cat because, well, if you don't undersant, I'm afraid you never will. Offically, 2006 has been the suck ass est year ever.

Self Esteem -- the other white meat Current mood: nostalgic Category: Life Issues with my self perception have been around since I was a kid. And I try to overcompensate for it when I'm hving my good life days, but when it comes crashing down, so does my self esteem. Quite recently, I entered into a situation that I'm not very proud of. It's an extention on my act of trapping a friend. Different guy now, and a different trap. Meet Kenny. A very smart guy with opinions out the ass. Not literally of course. He's a republican but yet he's centerlized. He sings, he thinks, and yes he's a heart stealer. I noticed I was falling for him within a week. And within that week, things progressed raher quickly for me. He calls it rebound. I call it knowing a good thing when I see it. He has always, from the beginning, told me that he would end up hurting me. And, yes, he did. But it wasn't his fault. It wasn't hi fault at all. Kenny is straight. And ...