Skip to main content
Okay, a lot has happened. I found out the girl I used to be in love with, Brandie, is about to get married to the jerk I can't satnd, James K. And Guess what, I'm invited to the friggin wedding. Ughhhhhhhhhh. Brandie and I have know each other for about two years, and she's known him about a year. Yet she isn't "allowed" to talk to me for extended periods of time, nor is she allowed to go to lunch with me like we used to. It's like, man, wow, he's in control, eh? He's 26 and she's 19. Ew. So, the wedding is tommorow, Saturday the 25th, at 1 pm. So, then I found out a couple of days ago, a friend of mine died. His name was Scott. I put the ad that was in the newspaper in the blog. I was good friends with him in middle school, but we kinda lost touch in high school. It totally sucks. I cried and laughed, and cried. His funeral is at 5pm tomorrow, saturday 25. The same day I found out about scott, I locked my keys in my car and I was in a bad part of town. Okay, maybe not bad, but it was a very different part of town. I had an arin to run. I just was so distrute by Scott that I just locked up my doors and forgot about the keys. So, I wait outside until my sis comes and bring my extra set of keys, when it started storming. Go figure. SO I was soaked. Standing outside my car, looking stupid. So, I was totally depressed and just locked myself in my room for the rest of the day. I have much more to say, but I'll shut up since Rosie wants to read this blog sooooooooooooooooooooo badly.

Popular posts from this blog

Ok, crying again. Depression is so stupid it sucks. Yeah, today, though, for a change, it's not about Aaron. But now I'm crying because I mentioned his name. But, the initial crying is because of Andrew Andrew Andrew H H H. God is very cruel to me, I'm thinking right now. Okay, I'm really crying right now and can;t see the screen. I don't understand why God made me love, I mean geinuenly love someone I could never have and it's just I don't understand why my heart is somewhere it doesn't belong. it's fucking insane. I'm so sic of feeling like I not going to be happy because of stupid little shit that shouldn't even be a fucking factor. God is suppiosed to be love. and love is supposed to besomething not easy to come by, but somehat that is obtainable. Why is it not for me. Why and I so fucking destined to be alone for my life. I want someone to fucking share this journey and I pled and I pray everyday. I follow the rules of ...

Mountains

  It was an impulse thing. For weeks before my grand gesture of driving to North Carolina  I was having pretty much a mental break down. A very grim dentist appointment, loneliness , attachment  to things that could never be mine, weight gain, the pressure  of business,  taking care of an elderly  paRant. At one point I just stood in the middle of a room not know where to go literally  and figuratively . All of a sudden an opportunity  popped up for me to go and I did.  Anyone who knows me know I'm not an impulsive  person but I just had to do this. To clear my head, to refocus myself.  I can get into the details on the trip at a later time. I want with this entry to focus on a single aspect. The thoughts that came to me while driving through the great mountains of this United States and the feelings .  I looked out onto the greatness  of this land and the beauty  it possess and I thought of some things. Deep things. ...
Oh Hi. Ok, so, my cat died. He was 70 in kitty years. It's kinda sad. Who am I kidding, it was a lot of sad. It's so weird after living with someone for 10 years of your life, the next day they are just gone. Of course, I can hear you dumbasses out there saying "Oh it's just a cat" but it's not. HE was my cat, and his name was Booger damnit. Ok, well, i've also been pissed off at another situation. Well, I have/had a friend, Kelly, who I've been friends with for a while now. Now, I knew before hand she had a problem with racism. Well, had a problem with the words. So, ok, i guess i learned to ignore the n word she sometimes uses because she, i thought, didn't mean it in an offensive way. But the other day, i guess i finally got pissed. I walk up behind kelly talking to her friend and her friend's little girl. Kelly said " ... this nigger was dancing up on me at the club..." Her friend started signaling her to be ...