I've had the Flu for about a week, so I haven't been able to really concentrate on writting in here. But I'm back. Todays worry is about getting old. I'll tell you what brought this on. A good internet friend of mine asked me to call him. Well, I didn't call but I did do this voice thingy with MSN messenger. So, I said hello to him and he started telling me that I sound like an old person. This, of course, hurt my feelings because everything hurts my feelings. Then, later that same day, Doug called me ugly. Well, we were playing around, I said to him, "God your a stupid booze drinking small dick loser" and then he in turn said, "You're a ugly 50 cent slut" and I took it to heart. God, I'm so stupid sometimes. I went and cried. I think I need some anti-depressants. I think I'm in depression but I don't know. I still have a totally high self esteem, and I like to get out and all that. It's that I'm way more emothinal now. Anyways, blah blah. Gotta get up early tomorrow. I hate a date. Yahoooooo. Tell you about it in two days.
Feeling Sad Hearing Jet- Look what we've Done Short Ooooo, look what you've done. You've made a fool of everyone. Oh well, it seems like such fun until you loose what you have have won. JUST DEPRESSION: Kevin wants me to quit my job. What can I say? Um, doesn't help that I started PMS'ing yesterday. I can think straight. I haven't anyone to turn to right now. My friends are away. Somehow I'm to wake up tomorrow and watch my best friend get married while I am so alone. While I'm so sad. While, I'm nothing but mush. And all day tomorrow I will have to keep that stupid smile on my face which draws me seconds closer to suicide. I'm sick. I'm tired. I barly have energy to get out of bed. I'm thinking selffishly. I've not lost myself, I've just made sure I can never be found for this depression is deeper, stronger, and more endurring than any of it's predesesors. To my lord I turn, to no avail, to my friends I tur...