Lives were taken in an instant. Our sense of security lost in seconds. This is just a small percentage of the words that are shouting in my head about the tragic events of September 11th, 2001. By now, we all know what happened. I am deeply saden by the events that took place. It makes this little diary thing seem so silly and not worth the effort. I felt that what I say here was absoulet. My ranting and raving about what I like and what I don't like seems almost pathetic compare to the emotions of lots and lots of people at these trying times. But then I started to remeber what all my friends taught me. That is the love of yourself. It's what has kept me going for so long. I feel this "blog" is a way to put a piece of myself out there for other to see. I feel that everything I do is a part of me, therefore everything I do is something worth while. So, eventhough I'm going to continue to do my blog and rant and rave about the small things in my life, just know that I'm not blowing this situation off. I'm just not letting the terriorist win. My thoughts and prays are with everyone.
Ok, crying again. Depression is so stupid it sucks. Yeah, today, though, for a change, it's not about Aaron. But now I'm crying because I mentioned his name. But, the initial crying is because of Andrew Andrew Andrew H H H. God is very cruel to me, I'm thinking right now. Okay, I'm really crying right now and can;t see the screen. I don't understand why God made me love, I mean geinuenly love someone I could never have and it's just I don't understand why my heart is somewhere it doesn't belong. it's fucking insane. I'm so sic of feeling like I not going to be happy because of stupid little shit that shouldn't even be a fucking factor. God is suppiosed to be love. and love is supposed to besomething not easy to come by, but somehat that is obtainable. Why is it not for me. Why and I so fucking destined to be alone for my life. I want someone to fucking share this journey and I pled and I pray everyday. I follow the rules of ...