Skip to main content
Hi. Well, ok, start off with the big news first. I was in a car accident Tuesday which totaled my car. Yeah, so I'm soar all over. The police seen the truth, though. Eventhough the witch turned in front of me while we both had the green light, apparently she said it differently. But, I'm so glad that there were witnesses that stayed until the cops got there and told them what really happened. I hate people who lie. The first thing I did after impact was not go over and kick her ass, not get all mad and start cursing. The first thing I did was got out and checked on her and her teenaged daughter who was in the car with her. But for her to then lie about what happened. Ugh

Anyways, enough with that shit. Well, the weekend before the car accident, a lot of shit happened. On Friday, Aaron convinced me to do something way stupid . I swear I hate the way he gets me to do stuff. So, we are having a little drink after he gets off work, and he sets up my web cam and goes to www.webcamnow.com . I know that he sometimes gets on there and "molest himself" for the enjoyment of other guys and girls watching him. He always gets so much feedback and friggen marriage proposals and money for sex and all that. He doesn't do any of that, by the way or I wouldn't let him have me. Well, anyways, three margarita's later, he convices me to enjoy the intmate relations with him on the cam for these people to see. Aaron has always had a way with making me feel totally comfortable with any situation. So, it was like the webcam wasn't even there. So, yeah, I did it. You can judge what I did. I understand it's not something everyone would do, but It was ok for me. Yeah, so, I'm a porn star now? No. lol. Sorry. Aaron said that peeps asked where I was when he got on webcamnow again this friday. He said he told them I was in a car accident but I'll be back when I'm better. I'm not sure about all that, but whatever.

Ok, so saturday, Valentine's day, I'm upset. Aaron didn't call all day, didn't come over. This is how pathetic my Valentines day was. I played Uno all day with my mother. Yeah, so, yeah.

Well, Sunday, I was home still pissed about Saturday, and Shawna calls up intoxicated. So, like usuall, I'm the friend. I got to go to Plainfield and pick her up because we don't drink and drive under any circumstance. So, yeah, I'm happy she called, but damn, what an incoinvience. I get there, pick her up, and she is totally wasted which is soooooo friggen irratating and nasty to me. She'd been drinking because Justin was being an ass to her. So, we're talking, and I'm being a friend and I gave some advice to her to the affect of, hey you shouldn't get wasted over a guy, no matter how big is dick is. Yadda yadda. So, she, inher drunken state, decides to be cruel to me. So say such things as " You're just pissed off because I have someone perminately and you only have a fuckbuddy" which is the truth. So, yadda, I let it go. Then she pulls out the "Looks" card that she always pulls out with other people, but never with me. She says " God. I would think that my best friend wouldn't be hatin' on me too for the way I look. So what if guys all gravitate twords me, it's not my fault that I'm cue and you're just average" OUT SHE WENT ! I was pissed and fumed!I put her out of my car right on West washington US 40. I took off. But, of course, I turned around after a minute because it was cold and that place was dark and I know she's just not in the right state of mind.

So, that was my weekend. then my car accident. I haven't been able to go back to school yet. I'm soar as hell, even with the pain killers. yay!

Well, I think I should try to sleep again.
Ralph is running for Prez? Ok.
Gay marriage in San Fransico? OMG, it's such a conservative place. I'm way surprized. lol. Take care everyone.

Popular posts from this blog

Ok, crying again. Depression is so stupid it sucks. Yeah, today, though, for a change, it's not about Aaron. But now I'm crying because I mentioned his name. But, the initial crying is because of Andrew Andrew Andrew H H H. God is very cruel to me, I'm thinking right now. Okay, I'm really crying right now and can;t see the screen. I don't understand why God made me love, I mean geinuenly love someone I could never have and it's just I don't understand why my heart is somewhere it doesn't belong. it's fucking insane. I'm so sic of feeling like I not going to be happy because of stupid little shit that shouldn't even be a fucking factor. God is suppiosed to be love. and love is supposed to besomething not easy to come by, but somehat that is obtainable. Why is it not for me. Why and I so fucking destined to be alone for my life. I want someone to fucking share this journey and I pled and I pray everyday. I follow the rules of ...

Mountains

  It was an impulse thing. For weeks before my grand gesture of driving to North Carolina  I was having pretty much a mental break down. A very grim dentist appointment, loneliness , attachment  to things that could never be mine, weight gain, the pressure  of business,  taking care of an elderly  paRant. At one point I just stood in the middle of a room not know where to go literally  and figuratively . All of a sudden an opportunity  popped up for me to go and I did.  Anyone who knows me know I'm not an impulsive  person but I just had to do this. To clear my head, to refocus myself.  I can get into the details on the trip at a later time. I want with this entry to focus on a single aspect. The thoughts that came to me while driving through the great mountains of this United States and the feelings .  I looked out onto the greatness  of this land and the beauty  it possess and I thought of some things. Deep things. ...
Oh Hi. Ok, so, my cat died. He was 70 in kitty years. It's kinda sad. Who am I kidding, it was a lot of sad. It's so weird after living with someone for 10 years of your life, the next day they are just gone. Of course, I can hear you dumbasses out there saying "Oh it's just a cat" but it's not. HE was my cat, and his name was Booger damnit. Ok, well, i've also been pissed off at another situation. Well, I have/had a friend, Kelly, who I've been friends with for a while now. Now, I knew before hand she had a problem with racism. Well, had a problem with the words. So, ok, i guess i learned to ignore the n word she sometimes uses because she, i thought, didn't mean it in an offensive way. But the other day, i guess i finally got pissed. I walk up behind kelly talking to her friend and her friend's little girl. Kelly said " ... this nigger was dancing up on me at the club..." Her friend started signaling her to be ...